Ok...this story is brilliant. I laughed out loud so many times. The petulance! I know he's a homicidal megalomaniac, but I dig this kinda...fluffy version. He got his slippers and his hug, after all. :)

hoot and a half!  thanks

Stupid Malfoys.  Can't count on them for anything!

This is brilliant!
I suggest Cissy gets laid. Might un-bitch her. Maybe Voldie should make her get laid, hehe. Maybe he should get laid, too. (Note to self: Go pick up mind. It is far too happy in the gutter.)

Oh excellent, needn't have worried about the bitching then..Poor Malfoys, having to put up with a disgruntled megalomaniac in hippogriff slippers (!) but I love the title, it somehow rings a bell.Another gem, keep it up.

I'm actually happy he got himself his hippogriff slippers. Even happier he got them by transforming a tapestry; this'll hopefully keep Narcissa bitching in case those maltreated carpets ever decide to come apart beyond complaining and repair.I love the almost (it's still Voldemort's musings) touching absurdity of it all and tremendously enjoyed this update.

Uh-oh, the Malfoys better watch their step! Poor, put-upon Voldie, having to cope with whiny, bitchy hosts. As for Draco and Luna, I'm sure they could make some really pretty babies. *Sigh*

*Shudders at the thought of the warped offspring of Voldemort and Bellatrix*But I'm still LMAO at your wonderfully, hilariously pathetic Dark Lord!

Narissa need a good f***.  She complains too much.  Poor Voldi having to put up with that.  Well at least he has his slippers.   Draco and Luna,  shudder at the thought.  Any offspring would be too conceited, arrogant and not to mention there would be nothing between the ears. LOL

*Snicker*Oh, poor Voldy. I love Narcissa bitching at him. And now I'm shipping Draco/Luna in my head. Imagine the blond babies!

Snitchette's absolutely right - just imagine the headlines about "He-who-did't get-Hyppogriff-Slippers". Does wonders for your Dark-and-menacing-Lord-reputation, though probably not as you would like to...

Author's Response: When the Aurors clean out Malfoy Manor, I'm sure Rita will tag along. 

I'd say if he isn't happy with the Malfoys he can always go and live elsewhere. I'm sure Hell would be great. I've also been wondering how the Wizarding World would react when/if they got hands on his diary. Rita Skeeter would jump on the moon from excitment.

The title of this chapter had me giggling even before I read!  Poor Voldie -- forced to live with bitchy hosts and go without hippogriff slippers!  Even Crucio would be preferable!  More, please!

Not good to be a Malfoy, then!

Poor thing, still no hug and no slippers. Teehee, but then, of course, that means he can't quit the glorious whining.. and there's is hope for an update. I'd love to read more of this strange and funny diary.  

just one word: brilliant!
Still ROFL.

LOL. Poor broken soul. Who'd have thought?